Nurture bonds with unwavering care, then gracefully step back, allowing space for growth and peace.
From
37
The Family
To
33
Retreat
Striking a balance
One can tell others that one loves them without forgiving them. taoscopy.com
The Family37
Focus on nurturing harmony in your community or family. Cultivate stability and mutual support by fostering open communication and shared values.
↓ Line 1
The foundation of the family is strong. By maintaining order and discipline, harmony is achieved.
↓ Line 4
A person who is a source of strength and support brings great benefit to the family.
↓ Retreat33
Step back and reassess. Retreat to gain strength and clarity. Focus on inner resources, conserve energy, and observe quietly. Let go gracefully, avoid confrontation, and prepare for future action.
Other titles: Family Life, Clan, Home, Linkage, Dwelling People, The Psyche, "May indicate a situation where the family can and should help." -- D.F. Hook
Judgment
Legge: For the regulation of The Family, what is most advantageous is that the wife be firm and correct.
Wilhelm/Baynes: The Family . The perseverance of the woman furthers.
Ritsema/Karcher: Dwelling People. Harvesting: woman Trial. [This hexagram describes your situation in terms of living and working with others in a common space. It emphasizes that caring for your relation with those who share this space and for the space itself is the adequate way to handle it. To be in accord with the time, you are told to: dwell with people!]
Shaughnessy: Family members: Beneficial for the maiden to determine.
Cleary (1): For people in the home it is beneficial that the woman be chaste. [In the human body, the vitality, spirit, soul, psyche, and intent all belong to yin and all take orders from the human mentality … When you refine away the human mind, the mind of tao spontaneously becomes manifest.]
Wu:The Family indicates that it is advantageous for a woman to be persevering. [This is a hexagram with its emphasis on women. Both constituent trigrams are feminine … Hence those who endeavor to be firm and correct will have advantages.]
The Image
Legge: Wind rising out of fire -- the image of The Family. The superior man speaks the truth and is consistent in his behavior.
Wilhelm/Baynes: Wind comes forth from fire: The image of The Family. Thus the superior man has substance in his words and duration in his way of life.
Blofeld: This hexagram symbolizes wind rising from fire. The Superior Man's speech is full of substance and he behaves with constancy.
Liu: The wind coming out of the fire symbolizes The Family. The speech of the superior man should have substance, and his conduct be enduring.
Ritsema/Karcher: Wind originating-from fire issuing-forth. Dwelling People. A chun tzu uses words to possess beings and-also movement to possess perseverance.
Cleary (1): Wind emerges from fire, members of a family. Thus is there factuality in the speech of superior people, consistency in their deeds.
Cleary (2): … Developed people are factual in speech, consistent in action.
Wu: Wind comes forth from fire; this is The Family. Thus the jun zi speaks with facts and acts with perseverance.
COMMENTARY
Confucius/Legge: In Family the wife is in her correct place in the lower trigram, and the husband in his correct place in the upper. That spouses occupy their correct positions shows the correct relationship between heaven and earth. The parents rule the family: let the father indeed be father, and the son son; let the elder brother be indeed elder brother, and the younger brother younger; let the husband indeed be husband, and the wife wife -- then the family will be in its correct state. Bring the family to that state, and all under heaven will be established.
Legge: The written Chinese character for Family simply means "a household," or "the members of a family." The lesson of the hexagram is the regulation of the family, effected by the cooperation of the husband and wife in their several spheres, and only needing it to become universal to secure the good order of the kingdom. The important place accorded to the wife is seen in the short sentence in the Judgment -- that she be firm and correct, and do her part well is essential for the family's proper regulation.
The wife is represented by line two and the husband is her proper correlate in line five. The relationship between heaven and earth is analogous to the relationship between husband and wife.
The second sentence of the Confucian commentary, more closely rendered, would be: "That in the family there is an authoritative ruler is a way of naming father and mother." This means that the assertion of authority in a family should be a correct balance of force and gentleness.
Anthony: The Family symbolizes correct relationships between people – the family unit, the spiritual family (the Sage and the student), and human groups generally. When these most basic relationships are correct, the world is made correct through the force of inner truth, through cultivation of the feminine component of our nature, and through persevering in a virtually menial position (from our ego’s viewpoint) so that our work can come to fruition. All this means to forgo striving and self-assertion, and to allow ourself to be led, while persevering in gentleness and devotion to our path.
NOTES AND PARAPHRASES
Judgment: For the correct regulation of the psyche, what is most important is that the ego must be firm and correct.
The Superior Man lives his allegiance to the ideals of the Work.
Applying the Hermetic Axiom: "as above, so below," the relationships within a family are analogous to the relationships within a city-state, or a kingdom, and vice- versa:
Society centuries before the time of Confucius had been organized on the basis of family. In the early days of the Chou dynasty fiefs had been allotted to the feudal lords in a system of planned colonization. These feudal lords, linked to one another and to the royal house by marriage ties, took their families, retainers, peasants, artisans and soldiers to form self-sufficient colonies based on an agricultural economy and governed from well-fortified walled cities. These large family groupings of the nobility were preserved only so long as the relationships of parents to children, brothers to brothers, and masters to servants were effectively controlled. D.H. Smith -- Confucius
If the ideal city is like a family, then the analogy also holds for an individual -- here the comparison goes directly from city to psyche:
Have we any greater evil for a city than what splits it and makes it many instead of one? Or a greater good than what binds it together and makes it one? ... Then is that city best governed which is most like a single human being? Plato -- The Republic
Psychologically interpreted, the hexagram of The Family symbolizes the psyche, and the Confucian commentary tells us that when its inner components all assume their proper roles and functions, then the Work will come into fruition. ("All under heaven will be established.") The identical idea has been stated in Gnostic thought:
Jesus said to them: "When you make eyes in the place of an eye, and a hand in the place of a hand, and a foot in the place of a foot, and an image in the place of an image, then shall you enter the Kingdom. The Gnostic Gospel According to Thomas
The husband is the analogue of heaven or the Self, and the wife is the analogue of earth or the ego. When the ego assumes its correct role as the magnetic servant of the Work, then inner transformations can take place. I have paraphrased the Judgment in terms of the necessity of the ego to follow the dictates of the Work, but one could alternately phrase it in terms of keeping emotional responses under control. For the wife to be "firm and correct" is to ensure that emotions, drives and appetites are not allowed to make decisions -- they are servants, not masters. This is the essence of the Work, and arguably the most reiterated idea in theI Ching.
The patient should be encouraged to use his mind, through observation and discrimination, to bring clearly into his awareness the irrational aspect of his drives and emotions, and also the possible drawbacks and harmfulness to himself and others of their uncontrolled manifestation … To act on the spur of an impulse, a drive or an intense emotion can very often produce undesirable effects which one afterwards regrets … Therefore, he should learn – by repeated experiment and effort – to “insert” between impulse and action a stage of reflection, of mental consideration of a situation, and of critical analysis of his impulse, trying to realize its origin, its source. R. Assagioli – Psychosynthesis
The thirty-seventh hexagram teaches us that the way to manage the emotions is no different than the proper management of aFamily. No wise parent can teach a child self-discipline by adopting the child's point of view: permissiveness, either with our children or our own primitive drives and passions, is a sure formula for disintegration. The Work demands that the ego hold the line on this issue -- indeed, it is the ego's only legitimate function.
We are dominated by everything with which our [ego] becomes identified. We can dominate and control everything from which we disidentify ourselves. R. Assagioli -- Psychosynthesis
Line 1
Legge: The first line, dynamic, shows its subject establishing restrictive regulations in his household. Occasion for repentance will disappear.
Wilhelm/Baynes: Firm seclusion within the family. Remorse disappears.
Blofeld: The family dwelling stands within an enclosure -- regret vanishes.
Liu: He sets up a rule for his family. Remorse disappears. [People can expect success in their plans.]
Shaughnessy: The gate has a family; regret is gone.
Cleary (1): Guarding the home, regret vanishes.
Wu: A family lives by the principle. There will be no regret.
COMMENTARY
Confucius/Legge: He establishes rules before any change has taken place in their wills. Wilhelm/Baynes: The will has not yet changed. Blofeld: The first part of this passage symbolizes determination which has never swerved. Ritsema/Karcher: Purpose not-yet transformed indeed. Cleary (2): The aim does not change. Wu: The goal has not been changed.
Legge: Line one is dynamic in a dynamic place. It suggests the necessity of strict rule in governing the family. Regulations must be established, and their observance strictly insisted on.
NOTES AND PARAPHRASES
Siu: At the outset, the man establishes firm rules of order and relationships in the household. Overindulgence of a young child leads to the difficult task of breaking the child's will later on.
Wing: At the very beginning of relationships or endeavors, you establish firm roles and well-defined systems, then all will go well. Even occasions that might give rise to arguments will pass without remorse.
Editor: A house symbolizes the whole psyche, so a household is all of the entities which make it up -- thoughts, feelings, appetites, passions, etc. The idea here is that one must maintain consistency and order in the situation at hand, and not allow any deviation from that order. Implied is the injunction not to indulge in inappropriate expressions of emotion. The line can sometimes mean that you have everything you need to succeed within you: you don't have to seek outside for what you already possess.
Therefore when the light circulates, the energies of the whole body appear before its throne, as, when a holy king has established the capital and has laid down the fundamental rules of order, all the states approach with tribute; or as, when the master is quiet and calm, men- servants and maids obey his orders of their own accord, and each does his work. The Secret of the Golden Flower
A. Put your house in order. Maintain discipline, define your parameters, and organize your priorities.
B. Restrict and control the expression of autonomous forces within the psyche. Do not deviate from established order.
C. You already have everything you require to attain your goals.
Line 4
Legge: The fourth line, magnetic, shows its subject enriching the family. There will be great good fortune.
Wilhelm/Baynes: She is the treasure of the house. Great good fortune.
Blofeld: A well-to-do household -- great good fortune!
Liu: One makes the family prosperous. Great good fortune.
Ritsema/Karcher: Affluence Dwelling, the great significant.
Shaughnessy: A wealthy family; greatly auspicious.
Cleary (1): A rich home is very fortunate.
Wu: This is a wealthy family with great auspiciousness.
COMMENTARY
Confucius/Legge: This is due to her docility and because she is in her correct place. Wilhelm/Baynes: For she is devoted and in her place. Blofeld: This good fortune is indicated by the position of the line which symbolizes cheerful acceptance. Ritsema/Karcher: Yielding located-in the situation indeed. Cleary (2): Docilely occupying its position. Wu: Because its position is well taken.
Legge: Line four is magnetic and in her proper place. The wife is again suggested to us, and despite her confinement to the internal affairs of the household, she can do much to enrich the family. Yu Yen (Yuan Dynasty) observes that the riches of a family are not to be sought in its wealth, but in the affection and harmony of its members. Where these prevail the family is not likely to be poor, and whatever it has will be well preserved.
NOTES AND PARAPHRASES
Siu: The woman of the family balances the income and expenditures, enriching the well-being and peace of the family. The faithful steward performs the same service for public welfare.
Wing: Attention to details pertaining to the economy of the situation brings good-fortune. Any attempts to further the well-being of others in a modest and humble way will be successful.
Editor: This line restates the message of the Judgment. Psychologically speaking, it re-affirms the idea that emotional energy under control and in its proper place is a great source of personal power. This is an image of the ideal role of the ego in relation to the Work.
Control of the emotions is a very important element of self-control in general. Often the concept of self-control conjures up the image of an emotionless, dry, rigid way of life. If a person is in complete control of his emotions, however, he can call forth any emotion he desires and is free to enhance it as he wills. Rather than be controlled by emotions such as love, yearning, or awe, he can control them. One can evoke these emotions and blend them together, painting every aspect of life with a rich palette of feelings. Control of the emotions can thus lead a person to experience a richer blend of feelings in his daily life than the average person generally experiences. Aryeh Kaplan --Jewish Meditation
A. Our emotions must serve us, not rule us.
B. The whole is enriched by the rectitude of one of its parts.
Other titles: The Symbol of Retirement, Yielding, Withdrawal, Retiring, Wielding, Strategic Withdrawal, Inaccessibility, Disassociation from Inferior Forces, “When an opportunity for something better comes along, do not quarrel with an impossible situation.” -- D. F. Hook
Judgment
Legge:Retreatmeans successful progress. Advantage comes from firm correctness and attention to details.
Wilhelm/Baynes: Retreat . Success. In what is small, perseverance furthers.
Blofeld: Yielding. Success! Persistence in small things wins advantage. [Much of the teaching of the Book of Change is concerned with the wisdom of restraint or withdrawal as the best way of achieving our goal under certain circumstances; so this hexagram is not necessarily unfavorable to the wise. This is not a time when we can hope to achieve much; but attention to small matters will stand us in good stead later.]
Liu: Retreat. Success. To persist in small matters is of benefit.
Ritsema/Karcher:Retiring, Growing. The small: Harvesting Trial. [This hexagram describes your situation in terms of conflict and consequent seclusion. It emphasizes that withdrawing from the affairs at hand to conceal yourself in obscurity is the adequate way to handle it. To be in accord with the time, you are told to: retire!]
Shaughnessy: Wielding: Receipt; little beneficial to determine.
Cleary (1): Withdrawal is developmental. The small is beneficial and correct.
Cleary (2): Withdrawal is successful. Small benefit is correct.
Wu: Retreat indicates pervasion. It will be advantageous for the little men to be persevering.
The Image
Legge: A mountain beneath the sky -- the image of Retreat. The superior man keeps inferior men at a distance by his dignified bearing rather than hostility.
Wilhelm/Baynes: Mountain under heaven: the image of Retreat. Thus the superior man keeps the inferior man at a distance, not angrily but with reserve. [He does not hate him, for hatred is a form of subjective involvement by which we are bound to the hated object.]
Blofeld: This hexagram symbolizes mountains beneath the sky. The Superior Man, by keeping his distance from men of inferior character, avoids having to display wrath and preserves his dignity. [The component trigrams, symbolizing mountain and sky, indicate withdrawal to a solitary place when circumstances are unfavorable.]
Liu: The mountain beneath the sky symbolizes Retreat. The superior man keeps his distance from the inferior, not with anger, but with dignity.
Ritsema/Karcher: Below heaven possessing mountain. Retiring. A chun tzu uses distancing Small People. A chun tzu uses not hating and-also intimidating.
Cleary (1): There are mountains under heaven, which is inaccessible. Thus do superior people keep petty people at a distance, being stern without ill will.
Cleary (2): … Being strict without ill will.[Petty people can be useful, so there is no ill-will, but their pettiness cannot wield authority, so be strict. In terms of learning to be a sage, the celestial ruler is the master, and the physical body takes orders from it, so that the desires of the various parts of the body cannot cause disturbance.]
Wu: There is a mountain under heaven; this is Retreat. Thus the jun zi distances himself from the little men, not because of despising them, but because of maintaining his own esteem. [The difference between the jun zi and the little men is one of education and not of birth. Confucius was a teacher first and a philosopher second, for he said: “Education is classless.” Every one of us has the potential of becoming a sage.]
COMMENTARY
Confucius/Legge: There is progress in Retreat. The dynamic ruler in the fifth place receives a proper response from his correlate in line two. The action is in accordance with the requirements of the time because what is inferior is gradually increasing and advancing. The actions required during a Retreat are of great significance.
Legge: Retreat is the hexagram of the sixth month when the yin influence, represented by the two magnetic lines, has established a foothold. This suggests the growth of inferior and unprincipled men in the state, before whose advance superior men are obliged to retire. Yet the auspice of Retreat is not all bad. By firm correctness the threatened evil may be arrested to some extent. Ch'eng-tzu says: “Below the sky is the mountain. The mountain rises up below the sky, and its height is arrested, while the sky goes up higher and higher, till they come to be apart from each other. In this we have an emblem of retiring and avoiding.”
Anthony: The correct time for retreat comes when others are not receptive to us, when delicacy of feeling is lost, when we begin to be attacked by doubt, or when our actions no longer yield progress. The person who can hold his ego in check has many creative moments open to him.
NOTES AND PARAPHRASES
Judgment: When carried out with shrewd discernment, Retreat is a strategy for success.
The Superior Man removes himself from disintegrating forces without calling attention to himself. He controls his weaknesses by maintaining his serious purpose.
With the possible exception of line two, there is very little ambiguity in the hexagram of Retreat. Without changing lines it is a clear injunction to remove yourself from an inferior situation, influence, emotion or way of thinking. The figure has certain affinities with hexagram number forty- four: Temptation which also depicts an inferior element encroaching from below.
To yield is to be preserved whole. Lao-tse
SUGGESTIONS FOR MEDITATION
Compare hexagrams number forty-four, Temptation; number thirty-three, Retreat; and number twelve, Divorcement; in that order. What are the next three logical hexagrams in the sequence, and what are the implications of the series as a whole?