Release expectations, honor your truth, and find joy in simplicity.
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The Marrying Maiden
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The Marrying Maiden54
Proceed cautiously, recognizing limitations and external influences. Adapt to circumstances with humility and patience, but remain aware of your own path and intentions.
↓ Line 4
Patience is required. Delays may lead to a more appropriate union.
↓ Line 6
Efforts are in vain when the essential elements are missing. Actions may not lead to desired outcomes.
↓ Decrease41
Simplify and reduce. Embrace minimalism to gain clarity and focus on what truly matters. Letting go can bring unexpected abundance.
Other titles: The Marrying Maiden, The Symbol of the Marriage of the Younger Sister, Marriageable Maiden, The Marrying Girl, Subordinate, The Second Wife, Converting Maidenhood, Returning maiden, Making a young girl marry, Marrying a young girl, Marrying a Maiden, Unilateral Action, Impropriety, Improper Advances, "Deals with life and death, sex and birth. It contains a warning about a person or situation. It deals essentially with discrimination. The first step on the Path without which we are useless." -- D.F. Hook
Judgment
Legge:Propriety indicates that action will be evil, and in no wise advantageous.
Wilhelm/Baynes: The Marrying Maiden. Undertakings bring misfortune. Nothing that would further.
Blofeld:The Marriageable Maiden. Advance brings misfortune. No goal (or destination) is now favorable.
Liu: The Marrying Girl. Undertaking leads to misfortune. Nothing benefits.
Ritsema/Karcher: Converting Maidenhood, chastising: pitfall. Without direction: Harvesting. [Without direction: Harvesting: ... In order to take advantage of the situation, do not impose a direction on events.] [This hexagram describes your situation in terms of the changing status of someone who cannot control their circumstances. It emphasizes that finding a real field of activity through accepting this imposition is the adequate way to handle it...]
Shaughnessy:Returning maiden: To be upright is inauspicious; there is no place beneficial.
Cleary (1): Making a young girl marry: To go on will lead to misfortune; no profit is gained.
Cleary (2):Marrying a young girl. To go on an expedition leads to misfortune, with nothing gained.
Wu: Marrying a Maiden indicates that it will be foreboding to make moves. There is nothing to be gained.
The Image
Legge: The waters of a Marsh with Thunder over it form the hexagram of Propriety. The superior man, in accordance with this, having regard to the far-distant end, knows the mischief that may be done at the beginning.
Wilhelm/Baynes: Thunder over the lake: the image of The Marrying Maiden. Thus the superior man understands the transitory in the light of the eternity of the end.
Blofeld: This hexagram symbolizes thunder over a pool. The Superior Man knows that, to achieve an enduring end, he must be aware of his mistakes at the beginning.
Liu: Thunder over the lake symbolizes the Marrying Girl. The superior man knows the cause of error, and persists in his virtue to the end.
Ritsema/Karcher: Above marsh possessing thunder. Converting Maidenhood. A chun tzu uses perpetually completing to know the cracked.
Cleary (1): There is thunder above a lake, making a young girl marry. Thus superior people persist to the end and know what is wrong.
Cleary (2): Thunder over a lake – Marrying a young girl. Developed people consider lasting results and know what is wrong. [The way developed people handle things is that before they take the time to ask how to start something, they first consider lasting results. If they think of lasting results, they know what is wrong with acting prematurely, like marrying an immature girl. If you understand the meaning of this, you can apply it to government and to contemplating mind as well.]
Wu: There is thunder above the marsh; this is Marrying a Maiden. Thus, the jun zi in the pursuit of lasting excellence realizes the flaws and corrects them.
COMMENTARY
Confucius/Legge: In the marriage of a young bride the proper relationship between heaven and earth is seen. Nothing could grow or flourish if heaven and earth did not unite. The marriage of a young bride is therefore both the commencement and goal of humanity. But here the desire of pleasure employs movement to attain union. This action will be evil because the lines are in inappropriate places, and the magnetic three and five are mounted on dynamic lines.
Legge: The Chinese phrase for this hexagram might be equivalent to the English "giving in marriage,” but there are some special meanings in this case which must be understood. The Judgment gives a bad auspice because the trigram of the Youngest Daughter is beneath the trigram of the Eldest Son. Since the action of the hexagram begins with the lowest trigram, we have two violations of propriety. First, the marriage is initiated by the woman and her friends. She goes unilaterally to her future home instead of the bridegroom coming to fetch her. Second, the parties are unequally matched -- there is too great a disparity in their ages. In addition, all the lines in the hexagram except the top and the bottom are in places inappropriate for them. Some commentators insist that the symbol of the contracting of a marriage in this hexagram sets forth some principles which should obtain in the relation between a ruler and his ministers.
The growth of things in nature from the interaction of heaven and earth is analogous to the increase of mankind through the interaction between male and female in marriage. The K'ang-hsi editors reconcile this good auspice with the unfavorable Judgment by saying: "The interaction of the yin and yang cannot be dispensed with, but we ought to be careful about it in the beginning in order to prevent mischief in the end.” The error here is that the desire for the marriage originated with the lady, and that she is heedless of the disparity in their ages.
NOTES AND PARAPHRASES
Judgment: Propriety means that unilateral action is inappropriate.
The Superior Man understands that the Work is guided from within, and that choices which ignore this truth can only retard its progress. (Present actions originate future consequences: pay heed to your choices.)
The traditional name for this hexagram is The Marrying Maiden -- a title which does not convey to modern western readers the subtlety of its symbolism. Blofeld says: "This hexagram is, on the whole, a most unfortunate omen ... We must not suppose that it deals only with marriage. What is said about the maiden symbolizes in some way or other what we may expect for ourselves within the context of our enquiry." The figure is certainly difficult, but "unfortunate" only if its import is resisted or denied: any portrayal of our situation which eliminates illusion (however painful the realization), must be regarded as a positive lesson.
Although the Confucian commentary describes this hexagram in terms of self-seeking aspiration, the wretched protagonist of the figure is not invariably culpable, and neither Judgment nor Image imply this. In addition to being at the very bottom of the social pecking order, the maiden is portrayed as half-blind, crippled and a "slave." Although condemned by the commentators for importuning a marriage that would raise her status, a close reading of the lines reveals that only the sixth place suggests possible impropriety -- the others all contain advice about how one of extremely low status should cope with restricted circumstances. The hexagram therefore can deal with either of two possible conditions: those involving Proprietyand those involving Making-do as an adaptation to adversity.
In the first instance, it is useful to compare the symbolism here with that of the preceding hexagram of Gradual Progress. There we see the organic progression of the Work allegorized as the proper marriage of a young woman. In this case, Gradual Progress has been turned upside down and the symbolism reversed: this young woman improperly pursues a marriage on her own initiative. Psychologically interpreted, it can be regarded as an image of the ego pushing its own agenda or desire for union.
The ego may move in directions and toward actions that are at variance with the intentions and standards of the Self ... The mature adult needs to recognize eventually his or her relative limitedness vis-à-vis the "Self- field" and the cosmic organism of which s/he is but a cell. We are subject to the ordering and growth intents of the entelechy of the whole. E. C. Whitmont -- The Alchemy of Healing
To recognize our `relative limitedness “vis-à-vis the Self-field” is to renounce our claim to unilateral action. Though the ego ardently desires a marriage with the Self, only the Self can initiate such a union. Chou Tun I, an early Neo-Confucian, makes an observation which illuminates Legge's Image:
"The superior man, in accordance with this, having regard to the far-distant end, knows the mischief that may be done at the beginning. The most important things in the world are tendencies. Tendencies may be strong or weak. If a tendency is extremely strong, it cannot be controlled. But it is possible to control it quickly if one realizes that it is strong. To control it requires effort. If one does not realize early enough, it will not be easy to apply effort.”
To receive this hexagram without changing lines can be an admonition to examine your motives and actions in the matter at hand. Where are you out of line? If no obvious impropriety is involved, it could also portray an essentially impotent predicament. At such times Ritsema/Karcher's synopsis bears repetition: "This hexagram describes your situation in terms of the changing status of someone who cannot control their circumstances. It emphasizes that finding a real field of activity through accepting this imposition is the adequate way to handle it.”
SUGGESTIONS FOR MEDITATION
Compare Propriety with hexagram number fifty-three, Gradual Progress, then compare them both with hexagram number thirty-one,Initiative. What are the similarities in their ideas? Now look at hexagrams number eleven, seventeen and twenty-two and observe the over-all philosophy which begins to emerge.
Line 4
Legge: The fourth line, dynamic, shows the young woman who is to be married off protracting the time. She may be late in being married, but the time will come.
Wilhelm/Baynes: The Marrying Maiden draws out the allotted time. A late marriage comes in due course.
Blofeld: The maiden stays unwed beyond the proper time, but the day comes when she makes a late marriage.
Liu: The marrying girl postpones marriage. She will marry later, waiting for the right time.
Ritsema/Karcher: Converting Maidenhood overrunning the term. Procrastinating Converting possesses the season.
Shaughnessy: The returning maiden exceeds the appointed time, and tardily returns having time.
Cleary (1): When it is the wrong time for a girl to marry, she delays the marriage until the proper time.
Wu: The marrying of the young woman is postponed. A later date is anticipated.
COMMENTARY
Confucius/Legge: After waiting, the thing may be done all the better. Wilhelm/ Baynes: The state of mind that leads to drawing out of the allotted time indicates a desire to wait for something before going. Blofeld: Her firm desire to postpone her marriage indicates that we should wait before taking action. Ritsema/Karcher: Over-running the term's purpose. Possessing awaiting and-also moving indeed. Cleary (2): The purpose of putting off the marriage is to go at the right time. Wu: To wait for the right time.
Legge: Line four is dynamic, where it should be magnetic, but in the case of a female the indication is not bad. The subject of the line, however, is in no haste. She waits, and the good time will come. It is she who puts off the marriage, not the other way around.
NOTES AND PARAPHRASES
Siu: The person does not throw her virtue away but waits. Her marriage will be all the better for it.
Wing: You are faced with a situation in which you must now refrain from action in order to await a more propitious time. It may appear that the world is passing you by as you wait, but your reward for maintaining your principles is on its way.
Editor: The line does not lend itself to the usual gender designations used in this book. The image is one of patient postponement, with assurance that the desired consequences will occur in the course of time. Wilhelm's rendition of "allotted time” suggests that fate is involved.
In the early community, the man who had learned to bide his time, for either revenge, barter, or any other objective, also had the advantage over the one who was compelled to act when the stimulus arose, without consideration of the consequences. Through having disciplined his own instincts such a man gained power over his more instinctively acting neighbors. The power of the medicine man rested largely on such self-control. M.E. Harding -- Psychic Energy
A. Be patient -- a union comes in the course of time.
B. Wait and see. Don't commit yourself -- it will all make sense eventually.
Line 6
Legge: The sixth line, magnetic, shows the young lady bearing the basket, but without anything in it, and the gentleman slaughtering the sheep, but without any blood flowing from it. There will be no advantage in any way.
Wilhelm/Baynes: The woman holds the basket, but there are no fruits in it. The man stabs the sheep, but no blood flows. Nothing that acts to further.
Blofeld: A woman holds a basket with nothing inside; a man stabs a sheep without drawing blood. No goal (or destination) is favorable now.
Liu: The woman's basket is empty. The man stabs the sheep, but no blood comes. Nothing beneficial.
Ritsema/Karcher: A woman receiving a basket without substance. A notable disemboweling a goat without blood. Without direction: Harvesting.[ Without direction: Harvesting, WU YU LI: no plan or direction is advantageous; in order to take advantage of the situation, do not impose a direction on events.]
Shaughnessy: The woman holds up the basket, there is no fruit, the man stabs the sheep, there is no blood; there is no place beneficial.
Cleary (1): The woman receives a chest, but there is nothing in it. The man sacrifices a goat, but there is no blood. No benefit is gained.
Wu: The woman carries a basket that is bottomless; the man sacrifices a sheep that has no blood. There is nothing to be gained.
COMMENTARY
Confucius/Legge: The basket is empty. Wilhelm/Baynes: The reason that the top line has no fruits is because it holds an empty basket. Blofeld: This top line implies absence of solid worth, hence the symbol of holding an empty basket. Ritsema/ Karcher: Six above, without substance. Receiving an empty basket indeed.
Cleary (2): The top (line) has no fulfillment. This is receiving an empty chest. Wu: The top line does not have anything substantial to offer, because she carries a bottomless basket.
Legge: The sixth line is magnetic at the top of the hexagram, and without a proper correlate, hence the unfortunate auspice. The marriage contract is broken, and union does not take place. The parties concerned offer sacrifices in the temple, but the woman's basket is empty and the man's effort is fruitless.
Cleary (2): When one does not accumulate virtue in life, then one has no spirit after death and cannot cause one’s descendants to flourish. Developed people, knowing what is wrong by thinking of the lasting results, see this at the outset.
NOTES AND PARAPHRASES
Siu: The man goes through superficial actions, such as offering an empty basket and a pre-slaughtered sheep to the gods, solely to preserve the form. This disregard for content bodes no good for lasting associations.
Wing: Are you just going through the motions? Is there content to the refined manner you present? If you are acting out of adherence to form, don't bother. Nothing will come of it.
Editor: Like everything else in the Book of Changes, this line can symbolize an enormous range of situations. At its most basic level, a union of opposites does not take place. Whether or not blame is involved depends upon the circumstances. Note that blame is not mentioned in the line itself.
Sacrifices, charities and penances performed without faith in the Supreme are nonpermanent. O son of Prtha, they are useless both in this life and in the next. Bhagavad-Gita 17: 28
A. An empty sacrifice, a fruitless offering, wasted effort.
B. A missed connection or fruitless union -- any further striving would be a waste of energy.
Other titles: Decrease, The Symbol of Lessening, Loss, Diminishing, Reduction, Diminution of Excesses, Decline, Bringing into Balance, Dynamic Balance, Sacrifice, "Not necessarily material loss. Can mean decreasing the lower self to increase the higher." -- D.F. Hook
Judgment
Legge: Compensating Sacrifice means that sincerely maintained rectitude brings great success. Action is appropriate if one's sacrifice is sincere -- even two baskets of grain, though there be nothing else, may be offered.
Wilhelm/Baynes:Decrease combined with sincerity brings about supreme good fortune without blame. One may be persevering in this. It furthers one to undertake something. How is this to be carried out? One may use two small bowls for the sacrifice.
Blofeld: Loss accompanied by confidence -- sublime good fortune and no error! It is favorable to have in view some goal (or destination). If there is doubt as to what to use for the sacrifice, two small bowls will suffice.
Liu:Decrease with sincerity: great good fortune, no blame. One may continue. It is beneficial to go somewhere. How can this (decrease with sincerity) be done? One may use two bamboo containers of grain for a sacrifice.
Ritsema/Karcher: Diminishing, possessing conformity. Spring significant. Without fault, permitting Trial. Harvesting: possessing directed going. Asking-why: having availing of. Two platters permit availing-of presenting. [This hexagram describes your situation in terms of sacrifice and loss. It emphasizes that lessening yourself and decreasing your involvements is the adequate way to handle it...]
Shaughnessy: There is a return; prime auspiciousness; there is no trouble. It can be determined. Beneficial to have someplace to go. Why use two tureens; you can use aromatic grass.
Cleary (1): Reduction with sincerity is very auspicious, impeccable. It should be correct. It is beneficial to go somewhere. What is the use of the two bowls? They can be used to receive.
Cleary (2): … It is beneficial to have somewhere to go, etc … They can be used for presentation.
Wu: Loss indicates that with confidence there will be great fortune, no error, perseverance, and advantage to have undertakings. What to use in offerings? Two boxes of grain are adequate.
The Image
Legge: The image of a mountain and beneath it the waters of a marsh form Compensating Sacrifice. The superior man, in accordance with this, restrains his wrath and represses his desires.
Wilhelm/Baynes: At the foot of the mountain, the lake: the image of Decrease. Thus the superior man controls his anger and restrains his instincts.
Blofeld: This hexagram symbolizes a marshy lake at the foot of a mountain. The Superior Man keeps his anger under control and is moderate in his desires.
Liu: The lake beside the mountain symbolizes Decrease. The superior man curbs his indignation and restricts his desires.
Ritsema/Karcher: Below mountain possessing marsh. Diminishing. A chun tzu uses curbing anger to block the appetites.
Cleary (1): There is a lake under a mountain, reducing it. Thus does the superior person eliminate wrath and cupidity.
Cleary (2): Lake below a mountain – Reducing. Thus do developed people eliminate anger and greed.
Wu: There is a marsh below the mountain; this is Loss. Thus the jun zi mitigates his anger and restrains his desires.
COMMENTARY
Confucius/Legge: In Compensating Sacrificethe lower trigram is diminished to increase the upper, and the flow is upward. The two baskets of grain accord with the time. There is a time when the strong should be diminished and the weak strengthened. Decrease and increase, overflowing and emptiness, take place in harmony with the demands of the time.
Legge: Ch'eng-tzu says: "Every diminution and repression of what we have in excess to bring it into accordance with right and reason is comprehended under Compensating Sacrifice. If there is sincerity in doing this it will lead to success and happiness, and even if the offering is small, yet it will be accepted."
The K'ang-hsi editors say: "What is meant by diminishing in this hexagram is the regulation of expenditure or contribution according to the time. This would vary in a family according to its poverty or wealth, and in a state according to the abundance or scantiness of its resources. If one supplements the insufficiency of his offering with the abundance of his sincerity, the insignificance of his two baskets will not be despised."
The waters of a marsh are continually rising up in vapor to bedew the hill above it, and thus increase its verdure. What is taken from the marsh gives increase to the hill.
NOTES AND PARAPHRASES
Judgment: A sacrifice creates equilibrium.
The Superior Man sacrifices his appetites to a higher principle.
The traditional name for this hexagram is Decrease, but the lines and commentary all describe a compensating exchange of forces to attain equilibrium. The idea of "sacrifice" is mentioned in the Judgment, and that also might make a good title, though the image of two baskets of grain suggests a balancing scale: a "compensating" device. In this hexagram, the flow of energy moves from below upwards -- the waters of the lake or marsh are dispersed to enrich the mountain. In psychological terms we think of the ego sacrificing or decreasing its autonomy to achieve psychic equilibrium with the Self: we forfeit something valuable to obtain something even more valuable. Without this quid pro quo, the concept of sacrifice is meaningless and irrational.
A sacrifice is meant to be a loss, so that one may be sure that the egoistic claim no longer exists. Therefore the gift should be given as if it were being destroyed. But since the gift represents myself, I have in that case destroyed myself, given myself away without expectation of return. Yet, looked at in another way, this intentional loss is also a gain, for if you can give yourself it proves that you possess yourself. Nobody can give what he has not got. Jung -- Transformation Symbolism in the Mass
Compare the Image message from hexagram number 15, Temperance with the notion of a compensating balance: "The superior man, in accordance with this, diminishes his excesses to augment his insufficiencies, thus creating a just balance." We are reminded of another "Temperance" -- the 14th Arcanum of the Tarot, which depicts an angel pouring water from one vessel into another: "compensating." A comparison of its symbolism with that of hexagram number 41 yields many insights:
The Path of ... TEMPERANCE, leads from ... the Personality [ego] to the Higher Self ... The whole experience is one of preparation of the Personality [ego], and the body in which it is operating, to deal with an influx of Light which would be devastating to a system unready to handle such energy. Most important here is the monitoring of progress, the continual testing from above. It is the angel here which is at once the Higher Self and the initiatory forces of Nature, which pours the elixir from vase to vase. This is an ongoing process of testing; measuring to see how much the physical vehicle can bear. R. Wang --The Qabalistic Tarot
Without belaboring the point, we can see that all sacrifice is a kind of remuneration: it couldn't be otherwise in an interconnected universe. The Image instruction for the superior man to “control his anger” is also echoed in the Temperance card. This relates to:
...an aspect of the Mysteries only rarely discussed, and certainly germane to the Twenty-Fifth Path [the Kabbalistic equivalent of the relationship between lines one and four in this hexagram]: this is the very real hostility often felt by the student toward the Path itself, as he works day after day and seems to be getting nowhere. Such hostility and frustration is in itself a major test; it is part and parcel of the work prior to the emergence of inner proofs. -- Ibid
"Decrease with sincerity" (Liu) refers to one's continuous sacrifice for the goals of the Work, and "curbing anger" (Ritsema/Karcher) is how one handles the archetypal forces evoked when the decrease seems endless and you've yet to receive anything in return. Like any other hexagram, Compensating Sacrifice can symbolize an infinity of possible situations, but psychologically speaking we can first regard it as an image of sacrifice for the purpose of attaining a balance of power within the psyche. Without the sacrificial devotion of the ego, the Self cannot attain its will; and if the Self can't make it, the ego is doomed by default.