Face conflict with grace and clarity, understanding that growth comes from navigating through challenges with integrity and openness. Let your journey transform into acceptance, ushering in unexpected connections and new beginnings.
From
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Conflict
To
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The Marrying Maiden
Tempering one's judgment
One advances facts that others refuse to admit. taoscopy.com
Conflict6
Conflict arises. Approach disputes with clarity and fairness. Seek resolution over victory. Compromise is key.
↓ Line 1
Avoiding escalation and not engaging in prolonged conflict leads to a positive outcome.
↓ Line 5
Engaging in conflict with a wise and just leader results in the best possible outcome.
↓ Line 6
Temporary gains achieved through conflict are unstable and quickly lost.
↓ The Marrying Maiden54
Proceed cautiously, recognizing limitations and external influences. Adapt to circumstances with humility and patience, but remain aware of your own path and intentions.
Other titles: Conflict, The Symbol of Contention, Strife, Litigation, Quarreling, Arguing, Lawsuit, "It is important to mind one's step at the very beginning then things will have a chance to work out all right." -- D.F. Hook
Judgment
Legge: Stress indicates that despite sincere motivations, one still meets with opposition and obstruction. Maintain an apprehensive caution. To prosecute the contention to the bitter end will produce evil results. It is advantageous to see the Great Man. It is not advantageous to cross the great stream.
Wilhelm/Baynes: Conflict. You are sincere and are being obstructed. A cautious halt halfway brings good fortune. Going through to the end brings misfortune. It furthers one to see the great man. It does not further one to cross the great water.
Blofeld: Conflict. Confidence accompanied by obstacles! With care, affairs can be made to prosper in their middle course, but the final outcome will be disaster. It is advantageous to visit a great man, but not to cross the great river (or sea). [In general, this hexagram indicates that we have little chance of success in any conflict, dispute or lawsuit in which we are now engaged and that retreat is the best policy -- unless line one or five is a moving line, in which case the position is more hopeful. We can profit from the advice of someone truly wise, but a journey of any kind at this time would be disastrous.]
Liu: Conflict; you have sincerity even though obstructed, stop halfway -- good fortune; follow to the end -- misfortune. It is of benefit to see a great man, but not to cross the great water.
Centering significant. Completing: pitfall. Harvesting: visualizing Great People. Not Harvesting: wading the Great River. [This hexagram describes your situation in terms of a dispute. It emphasizes that actively expressing your claims and objections is the adequate way to handle it. To be in accord with the time, you are told to argue!] (Sic)
Shaughnessy: Lawsuit : There is a return; pitying and tranquil, it succeeds to be auspicious, but in the end is inauspicious; beneficial herewith to see the great man; not beneficial to ford the great river.
Cleary (1): Contention; there is blockage of truth. Caution and moderation lead to good results, finality leads to bad results. It is beneficial to see a great person, not beneficial to cross a great river.
Cleary (2): …Wariness within leads to good results, but ending up that way is unfortunate … etc.
Wu:Litigation indicates an obstruction of trust. If the subject is vigilant, he will have good fortune. If he is libelous to the end, he will face foreboding. It will be advantageous to see the great man. It will not be advantageous to cross the big river.
The Image
Legge: The image of water moving away from heaven forms Stress. The superior man, in accordance with this, takes good counsel about the beginning of any enterprise.
Wilhelm/Baynes: Heaven and water go their opposite ways: the image of Conflict. Thus in all his transactions the superior man carefully considers the beginning.
Blofeld: This hexagram symbolizes sky and water in opposition. The Superior Man does not embark upon any affair until he has carefully planned the start.
Liu: Heaven and water go in different directions, symbolizing Conflict. The superior man contemplates the beginning before undertaking an enterprise.
Ritsema/Karcher: Heaven associating-with stream, contradicting movements. Arguing, a chun tzu uses arousing affairs to plan beginning.
Cleary (1): When heaven and water go in different directions, there is contention. Superior people plan in the beginning when they do things.
Cleary (2): … When leaders do things, they plan to begin with.
Wu: Heaven and water go in opposite directions; this is Litigation. Thus the jun zi plans well before taking actions.
COMMENTARY
Confucius/Legge: The coming together of Strength and Peril gives the idea of Stress. A dynamic line in the central place in the lower trigram shows how there will be good fortune if one maintains apprehensive caution; but because contention should not be taken to extremes, there will be evil if one prosecutes his contention to the bitter end. The great man sets a value on the due mean. If one attempts to cross the great stream, he finds himself in an abyss.
Legge: The upper trigram of Strength here controls the lower trigram of Peril which is trying to attack it. Or it may also be seen as someone in a perilous situation contending with strong outside forces. The image is of contention and strife. The sincere yang line in the middle of the trigram of Peril gives a character to the whole figure -- an individual so represented will be very cautious and have good fortune. But since contention is bad, even a sincere individual must fail if he pursues it to the bitter end. The fifth line represents the great man, whose agency is sure to be good. His decision in any matter of contention will be correct. The sixth line is also dynamic, but his action is likely to be too rash for a great enterprise, hence the warning about not attempting to cross the great stream.
NOTES AND PARAPHRASES
Judgment: Be careful, don't attempt much, and don't allow the situation to get out of hand.
The Superior Man is judicious about his choices of action to ensure that the situation remains stable.
The hexagram portrays a high level of tension. Wilhelm points out that the only "favorable" line is the ruler in the fifth place, and that all of the other lines symbolize people quarreling. It should also be noted that lines one through four counsel either retreat from contention or remaining passively in place. Only line five suggests that an active struggle can have a favorable outcome, and line six portrays the sorry fate of those who insist on "demanding their rights." If we turn the hexagram upside down we have Waiting, which suggests some subtle truths about the proper way to handle stress.
He who has a taste for dispute has a taste for blows, the man of haughty speech courts destruction. Proverbs 17: 19
At deciding lawsuits I am no better than anyone else; but what is necessary is to bring about a state of affairs in which there will be no lawsuits. Confucius
Note that Ritsema/Karcher's summation of the Judgment stands in stark disagreement with the general tenor of the figure: I have never received this hexagram when that interpretation has applied.
Line 1
Legge: The first line, magnetic, shows its subject not perpetuating the matter about which the contention is. She will suffer the small injury of being spoken against, but the end will be fortunate.
Wilhelm/Baynes: If one does not perpetuate the affair, there is a little gossip. In the end, good fortune comes.
Blofeld: Provided that affairs are not pressed through to the end and that as little as possible is said about them, they will end propitiously.
Liu: One does not continue the affair (conflict). Even if there is some gossip, good fortune in the end.
Ritsema/Karcher: Not a perpetual place, affairs. The small possesses words, completing significant.
Shaughnessy: Not permitting where it serves; there are a few words; in the end auspicious.
Cleary (1): One does not persist forever in an affair. There will be a little criticism, but it will turn out well.
Wu: Contention can never produce results. Although there are small talks about him, the outcome will be auspicious.
COMMENTARY
Confucius/Legge: Contention should not be prolonged. Although she may suffer the small injury of being spoken against, her argument is clear. Wilhelm/ Baynes: One must not prolong the conflict. The matter is finally decided clearly. Blofeld: This implies not dragging on a dispute. Though little should be said, its purport should be clear. Ritsema/Karcher: Arguing not permitting long-living indeed. Although the small possesses words, one's differentiation brightening indeed. Cleary (2): The explanation is clear. Wu: Clarification will bring about understanding.
Legge: Line one is magnetic at the bottom of the figure. She may suffer somewhat in the nascent strife, but will let it drop to good effect.
NOTES AND PARAPHRASES
Siu: At the outset, the man refrains from contention during the initial stages of strife. He suffers little. But he knows that he needs to walk together with his associates and cannot advance alone.
Wing: Your position is such that you must avoid any Conflict or terminate it quickly. Don't try to bring things to a decision or engage yourself in a dispute. You may feel a little victimized, but in the end all goes well.
Editor: This is a clear injunction to abandon the subject of contention or your line of questioning. The "gossip" sometimes refers to the inner clamoring of hurt pride or bruised ego.
As well loose a flood as initiate legal proceedings; break off before the dispute begins. Proverbs 17: 14
A. Drop the subject, or stop what you're doing.
B. Cease and desist -- don't allow the conflict to continue.
Line 5
Legge: The fifth line, dynamic, shows its subject contending -- and with great good fortune.
Wilhelm/Baynes: To contend before him brings supreme good fortune.
Blofeld: Conflict followed by supreme good fortune.
Liu: Conflict. To submit the conflict to a great man brings great good fortune.
Ritsema/Karcher: Arguing. Spring significant.
Shaughnessy: Lawsuit; prime auspiciousness.
Cleary (1): Contend; it will be very auspicious.
Wu: There is great fortune in Litigation.
COMMENTARY
Confucius/Legge: This is shown by his holding the due mean and being in the correct place. Wilhelm/Baynes: Because he is central and correct. Blofeld: This is indicated by the fitting position of the central line. Ritsema/Karcher: Using centering correcting indeed. Cleary (2): Contention is very auspicious when it is balanced and correct. Wu: Because of its central and correct position.
Legge: Line five has every circumstance in his favor.
NOTES AND PARAPHRASES
Siu: The man acts in moderation. By being in the right place he is on the road to good fortune. A just and powerful arbiter may be invited to mediate. Circumstances are in his favor.
Wing: Bring your Conflict before a powerful and just authority. If you are in the right, the situation will end in good fortune and success.
Editor: Because this is the ruler of the hexagram, it is portrayed as a wise judge who settles the matter of contention justly. If it is the only changing line, the new hexagram becomes number 64, Unfinished Business, with its corresponding line depicting a moral victory. One sometimes receives this figure in situations involving third-party arbitration.
If he attains the virtue of the long sword, one man can beat ten men. Just as one man can beat ten, so a hundred can beat a thousand, and a thousand can beat ten thousand. Miyamoto Musashi -- A Book of Five Rings
A. An affirmation or victory of some sort is indicated.
B. Your argument is persuasive.
C. Seek wise counsel.
Line 6
Legge: The sixth line, dynamic, shows how its subject may have the leather belt conferred on him by the sovereign, and thrice it shall be taken from him in a morning.
Wilhelm/Baynes: Even if by chance a leather belt is bestowed on one, by the end of a morning it will have been snatched away three times.
Blofeld: If a girdle of honor were bestowed upon him, he would be forced to strip it off thrice within one day.
Liu: Even if he receives an ornamental belt, it will be snatched away three times in one morning.
Ritsema/Karcher: Maybe bestowing's pouched belt. Completing dawn three-times depriving it.
Shaughnessy: Someone awards him a leather belt, by the end of the morning thrice strips it.
Cleary (1): Even if one is given a badge of honor, it will be taken away thrice before the day is out.
Wu: He may have been presented with a leather belt. He flaunts it three times in one day.
COMMENTARY
Confucius/Legge: He receives a reward through his contention, but still he is not deserving of respect. Wilhelm/Baynes: To attain distinction through conflict is, after all, nothing to command respect. Blofeld: Garments of honor obtained through strife do little credit to the wearer. [Note: In divination, garments of honor may be taken to symbolize any of the prizes obtained through a successful dispute.] Ritsema/Karcher: Using Arguing acquiesces-in submitting. Truly not standing respectfully indeed. Cleary (2): Not worthy of honor. Wu: Nothing worthy of respect.
Legge: Line six is dynamic and able to contend successfully, but is there to be no end of striving? Persistence in it is sure to end in defeat and disgrace. The contender here might receive a reward from the king for his success, but if he received it thrice in a morning, thrice it would be taken away from him again.
NOTES AND PARAPHRASES
Siu: The man gains repeated rewards from exhaustive conflicts. But the happiness does not last. The respect is undeserved, and the attacks continue without end.
Wing: If you engage now in forceful Conflict, it is possible you will emerge victorious. However, you will have created a situation of unending contest. Again and again, your position will be challenged. Such triumphs are ultimately meaningless.
Editor: This images a situation in which one may win the battle but lose the war -- a meaningless victory. The line is sometimes received when you are importuning the oracle for information it will not divulge: saying, in effect, "Even if your question were answered, you wouldn't be able to understand it."
For everyone fights for his own falsity and calls it truth ... These, because they can receive nothing of light from heaven, and can therefore inwardly see nothing within themselves, are for the most part ... such as believe nothing but what they see with their eyes and touch with their hands. Hence all the fallacies of the senses to them are truths; and it is from these that they dispute. Swedenborg -- Heaven and Hell
A. An illusory gain is a net loss. It's impossible to win in a no-win situation.
Other titles: The Marrying Maiden, The Symbol of the Marriage of the Younger Sister, Marriageable Maiden, The Marrying Girl, Subordinate, The Second Wife, Converting Maidenhood, Returning maiden, Making a young girl marry, Marrying a young girl, Marrying a Maiden, Unilateral Action, Impropriety, Improper Advances, "Deals with life and death, sex and birth. It contains a warning about a person or situation. It deals essentially with discrimination. The first step on the Path without which we are useless." -- D.F. Hook
Judgment
Legge:Propriety indicates that action will be evil, and in no wise advantageous.
Wilhelm/Baynes: The Marrying Maiden. Undertakings bring misfortune. Nothing that would further.
Blofeld:The Marriageable Maiden. Advance brings misfortune. No goal (or destination) is now favorable.
Liu: The Marrying Girl. Undertaking leads to misfortune. Nothing benefits.
Ritsema/Karcher: Converting Maidenhood, chastising: pitfall. Without direction: Harvesting. [Without direction: Harvesting: ... In order to take advantage of the situation, do not impose a direction on events.] [This hexagram describes your situation in terms of the changing status of someone who cannot control their circumstances. It emphasizes that finding a real field of activity through accepting this imposition is the adequate way to handle it...]
Shaughnessy:Returning maiden: To be upright is inauspicious; there is no place beneficial.
Cleary (1): Making a young girl marry: To go on will lead to misfortune; no profit is gained.
Cleary (2):Marrying a young girl. To go on an expedition leads to misfortune, with nothing gained.
Wu: Marrying a Maiden indicates that it will be foreboding to make moves. There is nothing to be gained.
The Image
Legge: The waters of a Marsh with Thunder over it form the hexagram of Propriety. The superior man, in accordance with this, having regard to the far-distant end, knows the mischief that may be done at the beginning.
Wilhelm/Baynes: Thunder over the lake: the image of The Marrying Maiden. Thus the superior man understands the transitory in the light of the eternity of the end.
Blofeld: This hexagram symbolizes thunder over a pool. The Superior Man knows that, to achieve an enduring end, he must be aware of his mistakes at the beginning.
Liu: Thunder over the lake symbolizes the Marrying Girl. The superior man knows the cause of error, and persists in his virtue to the end.
Ritsema/Karcher: Above marsh possessing thunder. Converting Maidenhood. A chun tzu uses perpetually completing to know the cracked.
Cleary (1): There is thunder above a lake, making a young girl marry. Thus superior people persist to the end and know what is wrong.
Cleary (2): Thunder over a lake – Marrying a young girl. Developed people consider lasting results and know what is wrong. [The way developed people handle things is that before they take the time to ask how to start something, they first consider lasting results. If they think of lasting results, they know what is wrong with acting prematurely, like marrying an immature girl. If you understand the meaning of this, you can apply it to government and to contemplating mind as well.]
Wu: There is thunder above the marsh; this is Marrying a Maiden. Thus, the jun zi in the pursuit of lasting excellence realizes the flaws and corrects them.
COMMENTARY
Confucius/Legge: In the marriage of a young bride the proper relationship between heaven and earth is seen. Nothing could grow or flourish if heaven and earth did not unite. The marriage of a young bride is therefore both the commencement and goal of humanity. But here the desire of pleasure employs movement to attain union. This action will be evil because the lines are in inappropriate places, and the magnetic three and five are mounted on dynamic lines.
Legge: The Chinese phrase for this hexagram might be equivalent to the English "giving in marriage,” but there are some special meanings in this case which must be understood. The Judgment gives a bad auspice because the trigram of the Youngest Daughter is beneath the trigram of the Eldest Son. Since the action of the hexagram begins with the lowest trigram, we have two violations of propriety. First, the marriage is initiated by the woman and her friends. She goes unilaterally to her future home instead of the bridegroom coming to fetch her. Second, the parties are unequally matched -- there is too great a disparity in their ages. In addition, all the lines in the hexagram except the top and the bottom are in places inappropriate for them. Some commentators insist that the symbol of the contracting of a marriage in this hexagram sets forth some principles which should obtain in the relation between a ruler and his ministers.
The growth of things in nature from the interaction of heaven and earth is analogous to the increase of mankind through the interaction between male and female in marriage. The K'ang-hsi editors reconcile this good auspice with the unfavorable Judgment by saying: "The interaction of the yin and yang cannot be dispensed with, but we ought to be careful about it in the beginning in order to prevent mischief in the end.” The error here is that the desire for the marriage originated with the lady, and that she is heedless of the disparity in their ages.
NOTES AND PARAPHRASES
Judgment: Propriety means that unilateral action is inappropriate.
The Superior Man understands that the Work is guided from within, and that choices which ignore this truth can only retard its progress. (Present actions originate future consequences: pay heed to your choices.)
The traditional name for this hexagram is The Marrying Maiden -- a title which does not convey to modern western readers the subtlety of its symbolism. Blofeld says: "This hexagram is, on the whole, a most unfortunate omen ... We must not suppose that it deals only with marriage. What is said about the maiden symbolizes in some way or other what we may expect for ourselves within the context of our enquiry." The figure is certainly difficult, but "unfortunate" only if its import is resisted or denied: any portrayal of our situation which eliminates illusion (however painful the realization), must be regarded as a positive lesson.
Although the Confucian commentary describes this hexagram in terms of self-seeking aspiration, the wretched protagonist of the figure is not invariably culpable, and neither Judgment nor Image imply this. In addition to being at the very bottom of the social pecking order, the maiden is portrayed as half-blind, crippled and a "slave." Although condemned by the commentators for importuning a marriage that would raise her status, a close reading of the lines reveals that only the sixth place suggests possible impropriety -- the others all contain advice about how one of extremely low status should cope with restricted circumstances. The hexagram therefore can deal with either of two possible conditions: those involving Proprietyand those involving Making-do as an adaptation to adversity.
In the first instance, it is useful to compare the symbolism here with that of the preceding hexagram of Gradual Progress. There we see the organic progression of the Work allegorized as the proper marriage of a young woman. In this case, Gradual Progress has been turned upside down and the symbolism reversed: this young woman improperly pursues a marriage on her own initiative. Psychologically interpreted, it can be regarded as an image of the ego pushing its own agenda or desire for union.
The ego may move in directions and toward actions that are at variance with the intentions and standards of the Self ... The mature adult needs to recognize eventually his or her relative limitedness vis-à-vis the "Self- field" and the cosmic organism of which s/he is but a cell. We are subject to the ordering and growth intents of the entelechy of the whole. E. C. Whitmont -- The Alchemy of Healing
To recognize our `relative limitedness “vis-à-vis the Self-field” is to renounce our claim to unilateral action. Though the ego ardently desires a marriage with the Self, only the Self can initiate such a union. Chou Tun I, an early Neo-Confucian, makes an observation which illuminates Legge's Image:
"The superior man, in accordance with this, having regard to the far-distant end, knows the mischief that may be done at the beginning. The most important things in the world are tendencies. Tendencies may be strong or weak. If a tendency is extremely strong, it cannot be controlled. But it is possible to control it quickly if one realizes that it is strong. To control it requires effort. If one does not realize early enough, it will not be easy to apply effort.”
To receive this hexagram without changing lines can be an admonition to examine your motives and actions in the matter at hand. Where are you out of line? If no obvious impropriety is involved, it could also portray an essentially impotent predicament. At such times Ritsema/Karcher's synopsis bears repetition: "This hexagram describes your situation in terms of the changing status of someone who cannot control their circumstances. It emphasizes that finding a real field of activity through accepting this imposition is the adequate way to handle it.”
SUGGESTIONS FOR MEDITATION
Compare Propriety with hexagram number fifty-three, Gradual Progress, then compare them both with hexagram number thirty-one,Initiative. What are the similarities in their ideas? Now look at hexagrams number eleven, seventeen and twenty-two and observe the over-all philosophy which begins to emerge.